One rule cannot cover this catalogue
Nearly every question about fit here comes in the same shape: what size should I order? It comes down to the style, since That’s A Awful Lot Of Cough Syrup puts out its desto dubb shorts fit guidance product by product, not once for the range. Two of the tees run small enough that the brand instructs you to order one or two sizes bigger. The published note on the bulk of the catalogue is true to size. Another two fit true to size but suggest you size up for the oversized look. You cannot fold guidance of that kind into one rule, and applying one anyway is how returns happen.
The absent size chart, and what that means for you
There is no global size chart, and the brand publishes none. Its own sizing pages, a general sizing chart and a separate t-shirt size chart, render without any chart content as of September 2026. A temporary outage is not what this is; it is the state of the site. Which means the product description is your only authoritative source on fit, and it is worth reading in full. Whatever measurement table for alocs clothing turns up on a resale listing, a blog or a lookalike store is somebody else’s reconstruction, not a published figure. Those charts are guesses, and should be treated as such.
The range of sizes you are choosing from
First, what is actually on offer. With small through extra-large on nearly every style, apparel runs XS to 3XL. 3XL appears on 48 products, so the top end is narrower than it looks and a 3XL buyer shops a subset of the catalogue. Denim and workwear stay off that ladder and are sized by waist from 28 through 44. For kids, sizes run 2/3, 4/5, 6 and 8. Every instruction quoted below comes from the brand’s own copy, and the sections are arranged by situation.
When a style runs true to size
This is the default across most of the catalogue and the easiest case. Given as fitting true to size: the Classic Cough Syrup T-Shirt, Hoodie and Sweatpants, the Dickies Button Down, the Dodger T-shirt, the Double Cup Cargo Shorts, the Women’s Booty Shorts, and the King Of The Kill, Drankenstein and Juicebusters tees. On all of these, order the size you normally wear. The classic tees carry a relaxed-fit description, so true to size already means a roomier body than a fitted tee. A relaxed medium, not a slim one, is what your normal medium buys you in a classic awful lot of cough syrup shirt. Should you want more room, the next situation applies.
When the page says to size up for an oversized fit
Simple to misread: two styles carry a note that does two things at once. Along with the line that for an oversized fit you should consider sizing up, the Warning T-Shirt runs true to size. The Double Cup Cargo Shorts word it slightly differently: they run true to size, and for an oversized fit you size up one. The instruction is conditional, not a correction. The garment is not mis-sized, and the brand is simply explaining how to reach a looser silhouette. When you want the intended fit, order your normal size; if you want it big, go one up and stop, because the note says one.
Where the style runs small
Skipping the product copy costs the most here. On the Wok Is Dead T-Shirt and the Promethazine Tour T-Shirt the warning is explicit: the style runs small, so order one or two sizes bigger than your regular size for a relaxed fit. Both are cropped, wide-fit tees in lightweight cotton jersey, rinsed for a vintage feel, with water-based prints front and back, unlike the heavyweight classic tee. When your usual size is a medium, that points you at a large or extra-large here. Because a cropped body is short by design, the extra size buys length as much as width. Why one rule cannot cover thats an awful lot of cough syrup as a catalogue is nowhere clearer than here.
When flat measurements exist on the page
Real flat measurements appear on a few products, and they beat every rule of thumb. The Double Cup Cargo Shorts carry waist and inseam: small 29.5 inches and 7.75, medium 31.5 and 8, large 33.5 and 8.5, extra-large 35.5 and 9, 2XL 37.5 and 9.5. The Wok Is Dead and Promethazine Tour tees carry published width by length from the back: small 20 inches by 17.5, medium 21.5 by 19, large 23 by 20.5. Lay flat a garment you own and like, measure armpit to armpit and collar seam to hem, then compare. Use the measurements wherever they are published, and disregard everything else. Assuming nothing, that comparison tells you more than any letter can.
When you are shopping for bottoms
A second logic governs bottoms, and it catches people out. Sweatpants and sweat shorts sit on the XS to 3XL ladder, and the Classic Cough Syrup Sweatpants are published as fitting true to size. Because denim and workwear go by waist from 28 through 44, there is no letter to convert. That takes in the cargo shorts, the carpenter pants and the Dickies-based trousers. Rather than guessing, measure trousers you already wear when you are shopping alocs shorts and the listing offers a waist number. No published conversion exists between them, and the two systems do not map onto each other.
When the product page says nothing at all
Judgement comes in where a listing carries no fit note at all, which is plenty of them. Your safest assumption is true to size, because that is the published default wherever the brand does say something. Beyond that, let the garment type do the guiding: a 16 oz hoodie and a 6.5 oz tee behave very differently, and heavier cloth is less forgiving. On an awful lot of cough syrup hoodie with no note, your usual size is the reasonable default, and one up if you want it oversized. Because a lightweight cropped tee running small says nothing about a fleece sweatpant, no rule should be imported from one style onto another. If the piece matters and the page is silent, choose one that does publish a note.
What to order, style by style, in one place
All of the published fit instructions sit in the table below. The middle column holds what the brand says on the product page, and the right column turns it into a decision. Nothing has been published for a style that is absent, so the true-to-size default applies. Resale listings and reviews are not the source of any of it, and nothing has been averaged into a general rule. Every line of it was checked in September 2026. Treat it as a companion to the product page rather than a replacement, since products come and go every few weeks.
| Style | What the brand says about fit | What to order |
|---|---|---|
| Classic Cough Syrup T-Shirt | Fits true to size; relaxed fit | Your usual size |
| Classic Cough Syrup Hoodie | Runs true to size | Your usual size |
| Classic Cough Syrup Sweatpants | Fits true to size | Your usual size |
| King Of The Kill, Drankenstein, Juicebusters tees | Style fits true to size | Your usual size |
| Dickies Button Down, Dodger T-shirt, Women’s Booty Shorts | True to size | Your usual size |
| Warning T-Shirt | Runs true to size; for oversized fit, consider sizing up | Usual size, or one up for oversized |
| Double Cup Cargo Shorts | Runs true to size; for oversized fit, size up one | Usual waist, or one up for oversized |
| Wok Is Dead T-Shirt | Runs small; order 1-2 sizes bigger than your regular size | One or two sizes up |
| Promethazine Tour T-Shirt | Runs small; order 1-2 sizes bigger than your regular size | One or two sizes up |
| Any style with no published note | Nothing published | Usual size; one up for oversized |
One last word on charts you find elsewhere
There is no published size chart for this brand, and that bears saying twice because it is the point most likely to save you a parcel. Somebody else made every chart circulating under the brand’s name, usually by measuring one garment or copying a template, and neither accounts for a catalogue where one tee runs small and another runs relaxed. The pages that ought to hold one load without any chart, and no gap is filled by the frequently asked questions. A wrong call is recoverable but not free, because returns exist with a refund window of a month from purchase and return shipping paid by the customer. The reliable sources are the per-product fit note, the published flat measurements where they exist, and a tape measure against something you own. Posting a box back costs more than reading the copy properly.